A list of famous funny sayings from famous people

1. "I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying." - Oscar Wilde

2. "I told my wife the truth. I told her I was seeing a psychiatrist. Then she told me the truth: that she was seeing a psychiatrist, two plumbers, and a bartender." - Rodney Dangerfield

3. "I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants." - A. Whitney Brown

4. "I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places." - Henny Youngman

5. "I'm writing a book. I've got the page numbers done." - Steven Wright

6. "I'm not superstitious, but I am a little stitious." - Michael Scott (The Office)

7. "I used to jog but the ice cubes kept falling out of my glass." - David Lee Roth

8. "I don't want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying." - Woody Allen

9. "I'm not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens." - Woody Allen

10. "I have a lot of growing up to do. I realized that the other day inside my fort." - Zach Galifianakis

Above is A list of famous funny sayings from famous people.

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