Divorce sayings humorous

1. "Marriage is like a deck of cards. In the beginning, all you need is two hearts and a diamond. By the end, you're looking for a club and a spade."

2. "Divorce is like a tornado. At first, there's a lot of sucking and blowing, and then you lose your house."

3. "I'm not saying my ex-wife is a bad cook, but after the divorce, even the microwave filed for custody."

4. "Divorce is the only time you get to keep the house and lose the spouse."

5. "Divorce is the process of uncoupling your life from someone you once thought you couldn't live without. Now you can't stand to be around them for more than five minutes."

6. "Divorce is the legal way of saying, 'I don't.'"

7. "Divorce is like a financial plan that starts with 'I do' and ends with 'I'm broke.'"

8. "Divorce is the ultimate 'I told you so' for all your friends who never liked your ex."

9. "Divorce is a lot like algebra. You look at your X and wonder Y."

10. "Divorce is the only war where you sleep with the enemy."

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