Funny jail quotes and sayings

1. "I told the police I was innocent, but they said 'Tell it to the judge.' So I said, 'Judge, I'm innocent!' And the judge said, 'Guilty!'"

2. "Jail is just like high school, except the prom queen has a face tattoo."

3. "I asked the guard if I could take a selfie in jail. He said, 'Sure, just make sure to use the mugshot filter.'"

4. "Jail is the only place where you can be locked up and still be expected to make new friends."

5. "I tried to organize a prison break, but nobody wanted to be the first to leave."

6. "Jail food is so bad, even the cockroaches have Yelp reviews."

7. "I'm not in jail, I'm just on a forced vacation from society."

8. "Jail is like a time-out for adults, except there's no corner to face."

9. "I asked the guard if I could leave early for good behavior. He laughed and said, 'Good one!'"

10. "Jail is the only place where you can be locked up and still feel like you're going nowhere."

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