Funny theo von sayings

1. "I'm like a possum, I don't do well in captivity."

2. "I'm not good at math, but I can count on my fingers."

3. "I'm not a doctor, but I can tell you if you're bleeding."

4. "I'm not a scientist, but I can tell you that mayonnaise is not a good substitute for sunscreen."

5. "I'm not a chef, but I can make a mean bowl of cereal."

6. "I'm not a therapist, but I can tell you that talking to your plants won't make them grow faster."

7. "I'm not a detective, but I can tell you that finding your keys in the fridge is not a good sign."

8. "I'm not a psychic, but I can tell you that your horoscope is probably just a bunch of random words."

9. "I'm not a lawyer, but I can tell you that wearing socks with sandals is a crime against fashion."

10. "I'm not a mechanic, but I can tell you that hitting your car with a hammer won't fix the engine."

Above is Funny theo von sayings.

French sayings and english translation

1. C'est la vie - This is life2. Joie de vivre - Joy of living3. Petit à petit, l'oiseau fait son nid - Little by little, the bird builds its nest4. Rien ne sert de courir, il faut partir à point - There's no use in running, you have to start on time5. Qui vivra verra - He who lives will s

Copy past funny sayings

1. I'm not lazy, I'm just in energy-saving mode.2. I'm not arguing, I'm just explaining why I'm right.3. I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.4. I'm not clumsy, I'm just testing gravity.5. I'm not a control freak, but can I show you the right way to do that?6. I'm not short, I

Awesome construction sayings

1. Measure twice, cut once.2. Building dreams one brick at a time.3. Hard hats and steel toes, building it right from head to toes.4. The foundation of every great building is a great team.5. In construction, every detail matters.6. Building a legacy that will stand the test of time.7.

Martin luther king quotes and sayings

1. I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character.2. Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.3. Injust

Alternative sayings to netflix and chill for metalheads

1. Mosh pit and thrash2. Headbang and hang3. Metal and mayhem4. Rock out and relax5. Shred and chill6. Blast beats and chill7. Metal up and wind down8. Scream and stream9. Riff and unwind10. Metallica and chillax

Cute sayings for teens with candy

1. Life is sweet, just like candy.2. Keep calm and eat candy.3. Candy is my love language.4. Don't worry, be candy.5. Sweet like candy, tough like a teen.6. Candy is my happy place.7. Life is short, eat the candy.8. Candy is the answer, who cares what the question is.9. In a world f

Sidney crosby sayings

1. Work hard, stay positive, and get up early. It's the best part of the day.2. You have to believe in yourself when no one else does – that makes you a winner right there.3. You have to earn your wins, you have to earn your success.4. You can't get too high or too low. You have to be level-h

Turning 50 sayings for signs

1. 50 and fabulous!2. Halfway to 100!3. 50 and thriving!4. Aged to perfection at 50!5. Golden at 50!6. 50 years young!7. Living life at 50!8. 50 and fabulous, just like fine wine!9. 50 and still going strong!10. Embracing 50 with style!11. 50 and loving it!12. 50 is the new 30

Sayings about bad family

1. Blood is thicker than water, but sometimes it's also toxic.2. You can't choose your family, but you can choose how much you let them affect you.3. A bad family is like a dark cloud that follows you wherever you go.4. Family is supposed to be your safe haven, but sometimes it's the place wh

Romantic brazilian sayings

1. O amor é como uma flor, precisa ser regado todos os dias. (Love is like a flower, it needs to be watered every day.)2. O coração tem razões que a própria razão desconhece. (The heart has reasons that reason itself does not know.)3. O amor é a poesia dos sentidos. (Love is the poetry of the