Jokes funny sayings funny quotes

Sure, here are some funny sayings and quotes for you:

1. "I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug."

2. "I'm not lazy, I'm just in energy-saving mode."

3. "I'm not clumsy, I'm just testing gravity."

4. "I'm not arguing, I'm just explaining why I'm right."

5. "I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing."

6. "I'm not a vegetarian because I love animals, I'm a vegetarian because I hate plants."

7. "I'm not short, I'm just more down to earth than most people."

8. "I'm not a smart aleck, I'm a skilled conversationalist."

9. "I'm not old, I'm a classic."

10. "I'm not a control freak, but can I show you the right way to do that?"

I hope these bring a smile to your face!

Above is Jokes funny sayings funny quotes.

Good morning positive sayings

1. Every day may not be good, but there is something good in every day.2. Believe you can and you're halfway there.3. You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.4. The only way to do great work is to love what you do.5. Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness i

Quill sayings

1. The pen is mightier than the sword.2. The ink of the scholar is more sacred than the blood of the martyr.3. The written word endures long after the spoken word is forgotten.4. A good quill makes for a good writer.5. The quill dances across the page, weaving tales of wonder and wisdom.6.

Never forgotten sayings

1. The only way to do great work is to love what you do. - Steve Jobs2. Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful. - Albert Schweitzer3. The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do noth

Joe frazier sayings

Here are some famous sayings by the legendary boxer Joe Frazier:1. You can map out a fight plan or a life plan, but when the action starts, it may not go the way you planned, and you're down to your reflexes - that means your preparation.2. I'm not God, but I am something similar.3. I've always

Catchy sayings about brain cancert

1. Fighting brain cancer with every neuron.2. Brain cancer may be tough, but I'm tougher.3. Mind over matter: beating brain cancer one day at a time.4. Turning brain cancer into brain power.5. Brain cancer won't dim my brilliance.6. Strength in the face of adversity: battling brain cancer

Black pearl sayings

1. A black pearl is a rare treasure, just like a true friend.2. In the depths of darkness, the black pearl shines the brightest.3. Like a black pearl, true beauty lies in uniqueness and imperfection.4. The black pearl symbolizes strength and resilience in the face of adversity.5. Just as th

Sayings with swing in them

1. Swing for the fences.2. Life is a swing, enjoy the ride.3. Swing with all your might.4. Swing into action.5. Take a swing at it.6. Swing and sway with the rhythm of life.7. Swing high, swing low, but always keep swinging.8. Swing for the stars.9. Swing with the wind.10. Swing w

Confucius sayings about age

1. At fifteen, I had my mind bent on learning. At thirty, I stood firm. At forty, I had no doubts. At fifty, I knew the decrees of Heaven. At sixty, my ear was an obedient organ for the reception of truth. At seventy, I could follow what my heart desired, without transgressing what was right.2. O

Missing you sayings death

1. I miss you more than words can express, and the pain of your absence is a constant reminder of the love we shared.2. Every moment without you feels like an eternity, and my heart aches with the emptiness you left behind.3. Your absence has left a void in my life that can never be filled, and

Being serious quotes and sayings

1. The only way to do great work is to love what you do. - Steve Jobs2. Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful. - Albert Schweitzer3. The best way to predict the future is to create it. - Peter Drucker4. Bel