Jokes sayings and quotes

1. "I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug."

2. "I'm reading a book on the history of glue. I just can't seem to put it down."

3. "I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands."

4. "I'm on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it."

5. "I'm not lazy, I'm just in energy-saving mode."

6. "I'm not clumsy, I'm just testing gravity."

7. "I'm not arguing, I'm just explaining why I'm right."

8. "I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing."

9. "I'm not a vegetarian because I love animals, I'm a vegetarian because I hate plants."

10. "I'm not short, I'm just more down to earth than most people."

11. "I'm not a player, I just crush a lot." - Big Pun

12. "I'm not a shopaholic, I'm helping the economy."

13. "I'm not a control freak, but can I show you the right way to do that?"

14. "I'm not a morning person. I'm barely even an afternoon person."

15. "I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing."

Above is Jokes sayings and quotes.

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