Comedian saying wrong sayings

1. "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush...unless you're allergic to feathers, then it's worth nothing!"

2. "Don't count your chickens before they hatch...unless you're really good at math, then go ahead and count away!"

3. "When life gives you lemons, make lemonade...but if life gives you limes, make margaritas and have a party!"

4. "The early bird catches the worm...but the late bird gets the leftovers, which is basically the same thing, right?"

5. "Actions speak louder than words...unless you're a mime, then I guess silence is golden!"

6. "You can't teach an old dog new tricks...but you can teach a young dog old tricks and confuse the heck out of everyone!"

7. "A penny saved is a penny earned...unless you're in a country that doesn't use pennies, then I guess you're just out of luck!"

8. "The grass is always greener on the other side...unless you're colorblind, then who knows what color the grass is!"

9. "All's well that ends well...unless it ends with a trip to the emergency room, then it's definitely not well at all!"

10. "Don't cry over spilled milk...unless it's almond milk, then cry all you want because that stuff is expensive!"

Above is Comedian saying wrong sayings.