Common stand up comedy sayings

1. "I don't get no respect!"

2. "What's the deal with airline food?"

3. "I'm not saying my wife is a bad cook, but..."

4. "Have you ever noticed...?"

5. "I'm not a doctor, but I play one on stage."

6. "I'm so broke, I can't even afford to pay attention."

7. "I'm not saying I'm old, but my birth certificate is written in Roman numerals."

8. "I'm not saying I'm out of shape, but my favorite exercise is a nap."

9. "I'm not saying I'm lazy, but I have a fear of commitment to my alarm clock."

10. "I'm not saying I'm bad at math, but I once tried to calculate my age in dog years."

Above is Common stand up comedy sayings.

Just leave me alone sayings

1. I need some space.2. I need time to myself.3. I just want to be left alone.4. Please respect my privacy.5. I need a break from everyone.6. I'm not in the mood to talk right now.7. I need some quiet time.8. I'm feeling overwhelmed, I need to be alone.9. I just want to be by myself

Ozarks sayings and

1. You can't make a silk purse out of a sow's ear. - This saying means that you can't turn something of low quality into something of high quality.2. He's as stubborn as a Missouri mule. - This saying refers to someone who is very stubborn and unwilling to change their mind.3. Don't count your

Confidant quotes and sayings

1. A true friend is the greatest of all blessings. - Francois de La Rochefoucauld2. A friend is someone who knows all about you and still loves you. - Elbert Hubbard3. In the cookie of life, friends are the chocolate chips. - Salman Rushdie4. A friend is one that knows you as you are, underst

Carrot rationing sayings

1. A carrot a day keeps the doctor away, but only if you ration them wisely.2. Don't put all your carrots in one basket, ration them out for maximum benefit.3. Ration your carrots like you ration your time - with care and thoughtfulness.4. In times of scarcity, ration your carrots and appreci

Poesy rings sayings for women

1. She wears a ring of poesy, a symbol of her strength and grace.2. In her hand, a ring of poesy, a reminder of her inner beauty.3. A ring of poesy adorns her finger, a reflection of her wisdom and power.4. With a ring of poesy, she carries the words of love and inspiration.5. Her poesy rin

Money attracts money sayings

1. Money begets money.2. Money attracts money like a magnet.3. The rich get richer.4. Money breeds money.5. Money follows money.6. Wealth attracts wealth.7. Money grows where money is.8. Money attracts opportunities for more money.9. Money has a way of multiplying itself.10. The m

Golf towel sayings

1. Keep calm and golf on.2. Swing easy, hit hard.3. Fairways and greens, that's the dream.4. Drive for show, putt for dough.5. In golf, as in life, it's the follow through that makes the difference.6. Tee it high, let it fly.7. Grip it and rip it.8. There's always time for one more ro

Sayings for church signs about love

1. Love one another as I have loved you. - John 13:342. Love is patient, love is kind. - 1 Corinthians 13:43. Let all that you do be done in love. - 1 Corinthians 16:144. Love never fails. - 1 Corinthians 13:85. Love your neighbor as yourself. - Mark 12:316. God is love. - 1 John 4:87.

Sayings about physical fitness

1. A healthy body is a guest-chamber for the soul; a sick body is a prison. - Francis Bacon2. Take care of your body. It's the only place you have to live. - Jim Rohn3. The only bad workout is the one that didn't happen. - Unknown4. Fitness is not about being better than someone else, it's ab

Best life insurance sayings

1. Life insurance is a love letter written in dollars. - Unknown2. Life insurance is the only plan that guarantees your plans. - Unknown3. Life insurance is not for those who die, it's for those who live. - Unknown4. Life insurance is a gift of love for those you leave behind. - Unknown5. L