Short jewish sayings funny
1. "If you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans."
2. "Why is it that when we talk to God we're praying, but when God talks to us, we're schizophrenic?"
3. "Even Moses had a GPS - God's Positioning System."
4. "I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness."
5. "I told my wife the truth. I told her I was seeing a psychiatrist. Then she told me the truth: that she was seeing a psychiatrist, two plumbers, and a bartender."
6. "If you can't say something nice, say it in Yiddish."
7. "I don't believe in miracles. I rely on them."
8. "I'm not a paranoid, deranged millionaire. God dammit, I'm a billionaire."
9. "I'm Jewish. I don't work out. If God had wanted us to bend over, he would have put diamonds on the floor."
10. "I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up - they have no holidays."
Above is Short jewish sayings funny.
1. I'm not superstitious, but I am a little stitious.2. I'm not unlucky, I'm just really good at finding the one thing that could go wrong.3. I have a black belt in accidentally hitting my funny bone.4. I'm not sure if I'm unlucky or just really skilled at attracting chaos.5. I have a talen
1. Accounting is the language of business. - Warren Buffett2. It's not how much money you make, but how much money you keep, how hard it works for you, and how many generations you keep it for. - Robert Kiyosaki3. Accounting is the backbone of the financial world. - Unknown4. Accounting is th
1. Jesus is the way, the truth, and the life.2. God is my refuge and strength.3. Trust in the Lord with all your heart.4. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.5. God is greater than the highs and lows.6. Let go and let God.7. Faith can move mountains.8. God's love nev
1. 60 and fabulous!2. Aged to perfection at 60!3. Cheers to 60 years!4. 60 and still rocking it!5. Sixty and sensational!6. The best is yet to come at 60!7. 60 years young and counting!8. Happy 60th birthday, you're a classic!9. 60 is the new 40!10. Celebrating 60 years of awesome
1. You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.2. You only live once, so make the most of every moment.3. You only live once, so take risks and chase your dreams.4. You only live once, so live with no regrets.5. You only live once, so make it count.6. You only live once, so
1. Too much of anything is bad, but too much Champagne is just right. - F. Scott Fitzgerald2. I only drink Champagne on two occasions, when I am in love and when I am not. - Coco Chanel3. Champagne is the only wine that leaves a woman beautiful after drinking it. - Madame de Pompadour4. In vi
1. Happy birthday to my husband, who is aging like a fine wine...getting better with time and a little bit more expensive every year!2. To my husband on his birthday: You may be getting older, but at least you're not as old as some of your jokes!3. Happy birthday to the man who still makes my h