Best funny sayings tumblr

1. "I'm not clumsy, I'm just testing gravity."

2. "I'm not lazy, I'm just in energy-saving mode."

3. "I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing."

4. "I'm not arguing, I'm just explaining why I'm right."

5. "I'm not short, I'm just more down to earth than most people."

6. "I'm not a control freak, but can I show you the right way to do that?"

7. "I'm not a morning person, I'm a coffee person."

8. "I'm not a smart aleck, I'm just naturally sarcastic."

9. "I'm not a social butterfly, I'm a social caterpillar."

10. "I'm not weird, I'm limited edition."

Above is Best funny sayings tumblr.

Quirky sayings about spiders

1. Spiders: nature's eight-legged acrobats.2. A spider in the house is a sign of good luck, unless you're an arachnophobe.3. Spiders: the original web designers.4. Why did the spider go to school? To improve its web development skills.5. Spiders: the ultimate spin doctors.6. When life get

Old time funny sayings

1. Well, butter my biscuit!2. He's about as useful as a screen door on a submarine.3. I'm sweatin' like a sinner in church.4. She's as happy as a clam at high water.5. He's slicker than snot on a doorknob.6. I'm so hungry I could eat the north end of a southbound mule.7. He's as stubbor

Cute irish girl sayings

1. May the road rise up to meet you.2. May your troubles be less and your blessings be more.3. A good laugh and a long sleep are the two best cures for anything.4. May you always have a clean shirt, a clear conscience, and enough coins in your pocket to buy a pint!5. There are only two kind

Good listener quotes sayings

1. Listening is a magnetic and strange thing, a creative force. The friends who listen to us are the ones we move toward. When we are listened to, it creates us, makes us unfold and expand. - Karl A. Menninger2. To listen well is as powerful a means of communication and influence as to talk well.

Halloween witch sayings

1. Double, double toil and trouble, fire burn and cauldron bubble.2. Witching you a spooktacular Halloween!3. Just a bunch of hocus pocus.4. Witch better have my candy!5. Broom parking only.6. Witch way to the candy?7. If the broom fits, fly it!8. Witchful thinking.9. Witching hour

Chrissy teigen quotes and sayings

1. I don't know what it is, but I love food. I can't stop thinking about it. I love to eat. 2. I always say that I'm really a happy person. I'm happy with my family and my friends and everything in my life. 3. I'm not going to lie: I love attention. I love it. 4. I think it's important to be

Can opener sayings

1. Pop the top and let the good times flow!2. Unlocking the deliciousness within.3. Crack open a can of happiness.4. Turning cans into culinary creations.5. The key to unlocking flavor.6. Opening up a world of possibilities.7. Lifting the lid on convenience.8. Canned goods, fresh tast

Funny great dane sayings

1. I'm not fat, I'm just big-boned... and fluffy.2. I may be tall, but my heart is even bigger.3. I don't drool, I sparkle.4. I'm not clumsy, I'm just practicing my dance moves.5. I'm not lazy, I just appreciate the art of relaxation.6. I'm not a couch potato, I'm a professional napper.7

Sayings about being automated

1. Don't let automation make you forget the human touch.2. Automate tasks, but not relationships.3. In a world of automation, don't lose sight of your unique creativity.4. Automate with intention, but don't lose sight of the bigger picture.5. Automate the mundane, but always stay engaged in

Rise and shine sayings

1. Rise and shine, it's a brand new day!2. Wakey wakey, rise and shine!3. Good morning! Time to rise and shine.4. The early bird catches the worm, so rise and shine!5. Wake up with determination, go to bed with satisfaction. Rise and shine!6. Every morning is a chance to start afresh. Ris