Funny flight attendant sayings

1. "Ladies and gentlemen, please make sure your seatbelt is securely fastened. If you don't know how to fasten a seatbelt, you probably shouldn't be operating heavy machinery either."

2. "In the event of a water landing, your seat cushion can be used as a flotation device. Just don't forget to remove it from the plane first. We don't want any passengers trying to swim with a 50-pound cushion strapped to their back."

3. "If you look out the window, you'll see our beautiful wings. Please refrain from trying to fly alongside us. We have enough trouble with air traffic control as it is."

4. "For those of you who are afraid of flying, we have a special service available. Just close your eyes, take a deep breath, and pretend you're on a roller coaster. It's basically the same thing, right?"

5. "In the unlikely event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure, oxygen masks will drop from the ceiling. If you're traveling with children, please secure your own mask before assisting them. If you're traveling with multiple children, good luck deciding which one to save first."

6. "We know you have a choice when flying, and we're grateful you chose to fly with us today. If you didn't have a choice, well, we're still grateful. Please enjoy the flight."

7. "As we prepare for takeoff, please ensure all personal items are stowed securely. This includes your emotional baggage. We don't want any turbulence caused by unresolved issues at 30,000 feet."

8. "If you need assistance during the flight, just press the call button and a flight attendant will be with you shortly. If you press it repeatedly, we'll assume you're trying to play a game of 'flight attendant tag' and we'll be happy to join in."

9. "We'll be dimming the cabin lights for takeoff. If you need a nightlight, we have some available for purchase in the duty-free catalog. Just kidding, please don't ask for a nightlight."

10. "Thank you for flying with us today. We hope you have a pleasant journey, and remember, the only thing we ask is that you don't clap when we land. We're professionals, not magicians."

Above is Funny flight attendant sayings.

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